Guardians will seek ways of improvement first when worried about their
child’s development: Slow development of language skills, strong fixations
on things, difficulty learning or joining a group. Anyone can feel motivated
when they hear that a certain method worked or that an ability to talk
developed from certain therapy.
In such cases, we need to pause for a second, and examine again how the
child is doing every day and what kind of difficulties their guardian faces.
Within daily living, there are many hints for cultivating the child’s development,
but there are also many things that need to be taken care of: Housework,
consideration for other family members, relationship with neighbors, etc.
Therefore, even important things tend to be overlooked or underestimated.
It could be said that it is easier for adults to realize that they were
able to achieve something, when they can see some kind of result, if they
use a certain method or therapy. However, be careful as there are many
cases in which there may be a strain if unusual methods are introduced
without enough attention paid to the child’s daily living. By confirming
the points below, let’s double-check whether it will really be for the
sake of the child when you take the long view, even if it seems to lead
to results.
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Does the new method or therapy create a crisis in the relationship between
the individual and the precious mother? For example, the mother becomes
obstinate, thinking “I have to force my child to do it even though it means
hardening my heart,” even though the child looks unwilling. The child pushes
back at their mother and won’t listen to her. They are both stressed out
and can’t enjoy themselves. |
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Is there a possibility that consideration and communication with other
siblings or the spouse will become difficult? Does it create tension in
the marriage, or does it create a situation in which a sibling has difficulty
reaching out to their mother? |
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Is the mother still able to feel joy or feelings of affection for the child?
Do feelings of impatience, such as: “We can’t carry on like this,” or “I
have to do something about this,” and increasing anger and frustration
arise? Are there physical and mental irregularities such as anorexia, headaches,
backaches, fatigue, insomnia, or depression? |
In such cases, you might think about your child too much, contributing
to a vicious cycle, so I recommend you consult with us. If you can talk
to someone reliable; a husband, a family member, a friend or staff at the
daycare or consultation center, you can sort out the difficulties you feel
every day and then you might find the best solution. They might tell you
that there are things that you can solve if you reevaluate your daily life,
or that you shouldn’t rush and it is better to take your time and see what
happens, or you can find a solution or improvement if you ask for the cooperation
of your family or people close to you.
We hope that the wishes of mothers for their child to develop well will
be granted in the child’s daily life, and would like to offer you support
through the shared experience of having daily communication with your child. |